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Self Awareness

Well, I traveled! – 03

… The most important thing for me – you know, who was dodging travel, mostly because of the logistics! – was to manage the transportation tickets. So I checked some applications to see what are my options to Budapest, and then to Prague, and finally coming home to Germany. Dude, can you believe how folks used to roll without these handy apps? Must’ve been like chill city, right? No GPS stress, just going with the flow – literally! Life was probably all spontaneous and easy. If you missed a train,… Read More »Well, I traveled! – 03

Well, I traveled! – 02

… There is a Telegram group of Persians live in Germany, who are interested in traveling. Months ago, I had an online discussion with a Persian guy I barely talk with, about some phycological subjects; He was the main member of the group I mentioned, asking me to join the group and travel more. I told him that I am not into traveling and for me, it is like a pointless waste of time and money as there is no achievement at the end. If I stay home and learn… Read More »Well, I traveled! – 02

Happy New Year?

I have decided to give up the Friends TV series that plays all the time in my flat as a background music, and replace it with any German-language media. I am not sure for how long the Friends has been my life’s background music. I have lived alone for more than 6 years, and I can not stand the long silence in my flat. Playing Friends gives me the impression of having other people around—people who are lovely and smart and whom you are not obligated to communicate with, but… Read More »Happy New Year?

Well, I traveled! – 01

I was struggling a lot to find the roots of me not being interested in traveling. It took lots of energy and self-discovery, and you know that it is torturing to dig into your emotional wounds when you are close to 40 years old! Actually, you may not know unless you are around 40, and you have done it. Well, believe me then! It is torturing. I realized the reasons could be that: I do not consider the world outside safe; I get stressed out in stations, airports, and any… Read More »Well, I traveled! – 01

Life is the same, EVERYWHERE

When I arrived in Germany, life was still going on, and I mean “the same”! I remember once my sister told me that life moments are the same everywhere. I never believed it until I came to Germany. Every thing was different —literally every F* thing— but the life moments were exactly the same. I mean the “now” moment you experience. You lie down on the bed in Germany and feel exactly the same things you were feeling when you lied down on your bed in Iran. You get hungry… Read More »Life is the same, EVERYWHERE

Just an intense night after immigration

I am sitting on my coach, and tears are in my eyes. Suddenly, I felt so sad, maybe lonely? I missed my sister and my mom. I talked with them on a video call today. We laughed and talked. But I just miss their hug. I need to be touched, you know? The other day, I read something very accurate on Twitter from a Persian girl living outside the country. The gist was: “Touch me! I have forgotten how to be touched after immigration. Here, I can only do handshakes.… Read More »Just an intense night after immigration

Life speed, inner speed

I always have a to-do-list. I am pretty sure I will have it even in my death bed, which may include: finding the right place and right moment to die. When I think very deeply, I am pretty sure I wasn’t like this years ago. I mean those years when there was no social media, or at least something like Facebook was not that popular in the small town I used to live in Iran. Those days, as soon as a creative idea was crossing my head, I used to… Read More »Life speed, inner speed